Hope :: Make a Decision

I’ve attended counseling before, and I’ve found it very helpful. One of the greatest pieces of advice I ever received was, “Make a decision. You may feel like all you can do is sit and watch TV. If that’s the case, it’s okay. Rather than doing it and beating yourself up about it” – yes, he knew me well by then – “start the day with the decision: today I’m going to watch TV. When you make a decision to DO something rather than letting something happen TO you, it changes your entire internal mindset.”

I thought he was crazy. I didn’t expect anything to come of it.

I didn’t watch TV everyday. Well, for me, it’s reading. I didn’t just sit and read every single day. But on those days where all I felt I could do was read, I ignored his advice.

For months.

And every time I spent an entire day reading, I kept thinking I should be doing something else, but I couldn’t bring myself to do so. And I would get so angry with myself.

One day I gave it a try.

I knew I was in a bad head space. I could feel it was going to be one of “those days”. So, I made myself a mug of hot tea and said to myself, “Today, I’m going to read. I’m going to finish this book, and maybe I’ll start another one.”

After several hours, I got up and started a long-overdue load of laundry.

I sat back down to read some more before moving my first load to the dryer. The rest? I wasn’t sure I’d remember to move a second load to the dryer, so I left the rest alone.

A load of laundry might not seem like much. But for me, on one of “those days”, it was a huge success. Especially since I had every intention of only reading all day long.

There are other days where I don’t even get that much done, but I walk away from one of “those days” without an added helping of guilt, which helps me recover from it a little more easily.

It’s not perfect, and I forget to make a decision often, but give it a try. Make your decision today.

Feel free to leave a comment or send me a message!

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