Wow! It’s been an incredibly busy and stressful season! And I’m not even talking about the holiday season.
As many of you have learned through previous posts, I lost my dad this time of year two years ago. Over the past 2 weeks, I’ve been really struggling with what I thought was depression (and there might be a little bit of that, but we’ll get back to that).
Nothing was helping, and it didn’t feel like my regular depression. This time, I felt frozen and, when I wasn’t frozen, extremely moody and willing to bite someone’s head off. That’s just not me!
I was talking to someone at work about it, and that I just didn’t know what was wrong with me; that I felt like I was drowning and yet numb at the same time.
She, smartly, asked me what’s going on in my life right now outside of work. I reflected and said, “Well, I have this huge final project due. I don’t know where to start, feel like I don’t have enough time to even get started, much less how I’m going to finish on time! And… well, actually, I guess that’s it. Holy moly, I’m completely stressed about that!”
I sat down late last night when I got off work, and I went through the notes I’d already taken (listing every single thing that was included in the examples of other final projects so I could pick and choose what makes sense for my project).
I began typing it up. I had the headers, but I needed to fill in the blanks for my own stuff. It’s all things that I’ve thought about before, but I’d never written them down. It didn’t seem quite so daunting when I was actually attacking each individual aspect of the project.
Today, I can’t say that I’m completely better, but I feel like I can actually breathe again.
See, that’s what stress does to us: it shows up in our lives as something else. Tiredness, sadness, depression, anxiety, etc. It took someone from the outside to make me look at my entire life and not just the feelings in the moment.
So I challenge you to take a solid look at your life. If you feel like you’re drowning, or frozen, or some other thing that isn’t normal for your day-to-day life, maybe you’ve got a major stressor you’ve been ignoring and it’s starting to take over.
I can’t promise acknowledging it will make it all better. Maybe for you it will. For me, it helped me to see what it was doing to my spirit and I was able to take a step back and reevaluate. I’m still stressed, but I’m not letting it dictate my mood anymore.
You can do the same!
P.S. I’m sorry for missing last week’s post, and I’m sorry for not recording this one. I wanted to get something out to you on time this week.
P.P.S. My next couple of weeks may not see a new blog post on time or even at all. I will try my best, but I’ll be working on this huge final and traveling home for the holidays.
P.P.P.S. Always feel free to message and/or reach out! I’m here for you, even if I’m not posting a new blog!