Hope :: Pretending

I don’t know about you, but I’m kind of a pro at pretending that everything is fine.

When I was in seventh grade, I began constructing a mask that no one could see through to get to my true feelings. Someone made me cry, then laughed at me, and I decided no one else would ever have that sort of access to the real me.

As you can imagine, that isn’t really feasible if you want to live a real life.

Over the years since I graduated college, I’ve slowly, inch by inch, removed that mask.

But it still comes out. Often.

At work and in my videos, I’m a super bubbly individual. Many people would never know that I’m actually an introvert. Yes, being outgoing IS part of my real personality! But it leaves me exhausted. I spend most of my time at home with my nose buried in a book so I can recharge.

I’ve recently found a group of people who can see beyond the mask I don when I’m being bubbly at my job. And they call me on it. All. The. Time.

And you know what? I can’t even be mad about it. They don’t call me out in a bad way. Rather, they can always tell when something is heavy on my mind and they make me talk about it.

In the moment, it’s uncomfortable and I want to balk. But when I do ‘fess up, I always feel better.

In what ways are you pretending? What truths are you hiding? And what are you hiding behind?

As always, please feel free to reach out here or on any of my social media profiles that are linked directly from this page.

Pretending is an easy thing to do when you’ve had practice. But just like me, you’re not being fair to yourself when you hide who you truly are in ALL parts of your life.

Your outward self should reflect the truth of who you are on the inside.

Don’t get me wrong: I AM a bubbly person! But that isn’t all I am. I have my struggles too.

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